Maybe Baby
by Em4
Summary: Sequel to The Dress. Carter and Abby are married and trying for a baby, with little initial success.
1. Bad News

TITLE: She's Having a Baby  
AUTHOR: Em  
EMAIL: zjle137@hotmail.com  
CATEGORY: JC/AL Romance/General/Humour (I hope!)  
RATING: PG at the moment. Doubt it will get any higher than that.  
SPOILERS: None. This is all just a product of my fertile imagination.  
ARCHIVE: Just ask first.  
DISCLAIMER: I own none of the characters of ER.  
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is a sequel to my fic "The Dress". If any of you have seen the Kevin Bacon film "She's Having a Baby" then you might be able to see where I've drawn some inspiration from.  
SUMMARY: Carter and Abby, still happily married after a year, are trying for a baby with little success.  
  
Part 1  
  
It had been a busy shift: three major traumas in the space of two hours, coupled with a temporary staff shortage and the usual assortment of minor ailments, meant that the remaining Doctors were feeling especially tired. Dr John Carter, the newest attending at Cook County General's Emergency Department, was standing behind the admit desk, hoping against hope that he had cleared the last of his patients and that he could finish off the last part of his shift in relative peace and quiet. He shouldn't have spoken so soon. Just as he was about to duck into the lounge to grab some sleep on the couch a petite, brunette nurse came towards him and started loading him up with patient files, giving him a rundown on each of them as she did so.  
  
"Labs are back on that kid with Strep in two, you have an abscess that needs draining in four, there's a minor MVA pulling up in 10 minutes, and Dr Lewis had to run out for an hour and asked if you could cover her patients for her."  
  
He stared at her over the top of the massive pile of files that he was now carrying and sighed with a mixture of frustration and disbelief. He had been *that* close to getting away.  
  
"Anything else?" he asked sarcastically.  
  
"Yeah, you're really cute when you're flustered." Abby stood up her tiptoes and gave him a quick peck on the lips. "Okay, I'm off now. I'll try to have dinner ready when you come home." Saying this she gave him another quick kiss and then turned to enter the lounge.  
  
"Hey, where are you going?" Carter put the stack of files on the admit desk and followed her into the lounge, where she was standing by her locker and putting her coat on. "You can't just dump me with the Everest of patient files and then walk off!"  
  
"Oh yes I can!" she answered in a singsong voice as she stood up on her toes to whisper in his ear. "Did somebody forget that I have an appointment with Dr Infante today?"  
  
Carter seemed a little taken aback by this news. "That's today? I thought you were going to make it next week so that we could go together?"  
  
"I was planning on that, but she had a last-minute cancellation yesterday and her office phoned to ask if I wanted it, so I said 'yes.' Don't get all mopey about it!" she said, noticing the fake-pout look he always gave her when he wasn't getting his own way. "I'll come right home and I won't tell anybody else until I've told you. Okay?"  
  
"It's not that. I just wanted to be there when she…you know, when we find out. So I can say that I was with you from the very beginning." He pulled her closer to him in a hug, wrapping his arms tightly around her slight waist and nuzzling her neck.  
  
"John! People are watching!" She looked through the window in the lounge door to see a few smiling faces peering at them from the admit desk. She tried to pull free of his arms, although not very hard, so he just continued with his ministrations.  
  
"I don't care!" His voice sounded muffled against her neck. "If I'm going to have to spend another two hours in this place without you then I'm going to have to have some happy thoughts to keep me going."  
  
"Well," she said quietly in her most seductive voice so that only he could hear, "if you want happy thoughts why don't you try to imagine me…at home…in the shower…warm soapy bubbles running down my body…"  
  
Carter immediately stopped kissing her and pulled back, the image of her naked in the shower causing him to stand frozen to the spot for a moment. Abby laughed and waved her hand in front of his eyes, trying to wake him out of the trance he seemed to be in, and seeing that it looked to last a while she kissed his cheek and left the lounge.   
  
This seemed to have an immediate effect of Carter. He shook himself out of his daydream and chased out after her. He caught up with her in the ambulance bay, just as she was about to turn the corner to the El station.  
  
"No no no no NO!" he called out to her. "You are not going to do this to me and then leave. How am I supposed to concentrate for the rest of the shift thinking about that?"  
  
She turned around and walked backwards for a few steps as she gave him a little wave. "Bye Honey!!" she shouted. He could have sworn he saw an evil grin on her face as she said this; she knew the effect she had on him and it gave her some sort of perverse pleasure to see him suffer like this! He continued watching the ambulance bay for a long while after she had left, trying to think about other things than Abby in the shower, so he didn't notice at first when Malik came up to him and handed him a disposable trauma gown and a pair of gloves.  
  
"Hey man, what's up?" Malik asked when Carter took the things from him absently, probably not even noticing that he held them.  
  
"My wife is a sadist," Carter deadpanned.   
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Nothing." He shook his head and laughed quietly to himself before turning to face Malik. "Come on, we've got an MVA pulling up. Could you give me a hand with my gown?"  
  
~~~  
  
Carter trudged wearily up the stairs to his and Abby's apartment and began searching his pockets for the keys. The 'minor MVA' Abby had told him to expect had turned out to be a multiple pile-up on the expressway so his hopes of getting away on time that night had been well and truly scuppered. He turned the key in the lock but, as always, the door refused to budge. Abby seemed to be the only person capable of getting the door to open and he just couldn't get the knack: he had been planning on getting around to fixing a new door for well over a year now but somehow he and Abby had always found better things to do on their days off!   
  
He started to bash his shoulder against it whilst jiggling the key in the lock but he couldn't seem to get it open. Luckily on the third attempt the door opened from the inside, revealing Abby wearing a pair of sweat-pants and one of his old college t-shirts. She smiled as she regarded the rather pathetic figure he presented: wrinkled scrubs, lank hair, large dark bags under his eyes, and a puppy-dog look on his face as he pouted and rubbed his shoulder.  
  
"One day you're going to come crashing through this door and then where will we be!" she asked, standing aside to let him into the apartment and accepting the kiss he dropped on her cheek as he passed her.  
  
"In an apartment where you have a chance of getting through the door without breaking a couple of bones?" he commented. He threw his keys onto the table in the hallway and started to walk towards the kitchen to pour himself a cup of coffee. Her voice followed him at a distance:   
  
"How many times have I told you? Kick the bottom twice before giving it a good hard nudge with your shoulder!"  
  
"If you'd just let me call somebody in I could get a new door fixed and I wouldn't need to worry about how many times I have to kick the door before I dislocate my shoulder." This was a discussion they had had many times and he welcomed the return of their banter after a long day at work.  
  
"Why do we need to call somebody in when I have a big strong man at home to handle these sort of jobs for me?" her voice was closer now, and he smiled as he felt her come up behind him and wrap her arms around his waist. "Hey Babe," she placed a kiss between his shoulder-blades and rested her cheek against his back. "Rough day?"  
  
"You have no idea," he answered tiredly, turning in her arms to pull her into an embrace. "The only thing that has kept me going is the thought of seeing you and finding out whether we're finally going to be able to tell our parents that they can be proud grandparents." He felt Abby stiffen in his arms and pull away from him. He regarded her with puzzlement as the happy smile and demeanour she had met him with at the door had disappeared to be replaced by an awkward look, almost as if she had something important to tell him but she didn't know how to broach the subject.  
  
"I'm not pregnant, John," she said sadly.  
  
"Well, that could be for any number of reasons." Carter was a little disappointed at this news, but he quickly pushed his disappointment aside and smiled at Abby, trying to put a positive spin on the situation. "We both knew going into this it could take up to six months to get pregnant after you went off the pill."  
  
"But we've been trying for nearly a year now…" She was trying to explain something to him, bring up a difficult subject, but he didn't seem to be catching on as quickly as he normally would.  
  
"It's not a problem. This is just something we have to talk to Dr Infante next time we see her."  
  
"I have talked to her. Today. We talked about it a little after…after she told me it was another false alarm," she rushed, not wanting to dwell on this sad news. "The good news is that she doesn't think we *can't* get pregnant by ourselves, so we're not talking about IVF or adoption or anything like that."  
  
"That's good," he said reassuringly, but noting the sad look on her face he knew there was something else she was reluctant to tell him. "Okay, if that's the good news then what's the bad news?"  
  
"She says it's probably just a problem with our…I don't know how to put this…one of us isn't quite up to speed the other one in the productivity department?" She looked down at her feet and bit her lower lip as she waited for his reaction. When she finally found the courage to look back to his eyes she was surprised by the look of tenderness and concern she saw there…this wasn't the reaction she had been expecting!  
  
"Oh honey, its okay!" He put his arms around her waist and rocked her slowly, almost as if he were cradling a child. "Is that why you were so upset? You didn't have to be afraid to tell me about this. We'll deal. I'll be there to help you with the tests, and the appointments and anything else…"  
  
Abby suddenly realised that he had not understood what she meant. She had to put him straight as soon as possible! "No, John, you don't understand!" she interrupted, pulling back slightly so that she could get a proper look at him. She took his face in her hands and stared into his eyes. "I already had the tests; Dr Infante rushed the results through for me…I'm fine. Everything's normal 'down there.'"  
  
Carter began to look at her with a growing look of realisation, followed by a slight hint of terror. "So…if it's not you, then that must mean…"  
  
Abby nodded and reached over to pick something up from the nearby table. Carter looked down at the little plastic specimen cup she had just handed to him and froze as the full implication hit him.  
  
Abby continued, seeing that Carter was too shocked to ask any questions just yet. "Dr Infante says you should fill that and take it over to her office first thing in the morning."  
  
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(Okay, first chapter. What do you think? Worth continuing? Just to clarify, I'm not saying that Carter is infertile so please don't hate me! To find out what the problem is you'll just have to stay tuned. I'll hopefully have some more chapters next week. Please review as you know I appreciate it. Thank you! Em) 


	2. Waiting and...I'm not going to finish th...

(I am so sorry it has taken me so long to post this part but I encountered a severe case of writer's block. I had it mostly written but then I started to play Spider-Solitaire and lost a couple of games. I told myself that I'd finish writing as soon as I won a game...164 losses in a row at last count! I thought it better to just give up and finish writing. Thanks for all the reviews and your extreme patience. Enjoy.)  
  
Part 2  
  
Carter walked through the doors of the clinic and took in his surroundings. The reception area was bright and cheerful, painted in a warm cream as opposed to the clinical white he was expecting, and the profusion of pot plants and paintings gave the impression of a hotel lobby rather than the place that was going to determine his manhood. Looking past the double row of chairs he could see the young, efficient receptionist sitting behind the desk, sifting through various pieces of paper in front of her and answering the telephone that rang intermittently. He watched as she put the phone down and turned her attention back to the files in front of her, then taking a deep breath and squaring his shoulders he walked up to the receptionist.  
  
"Excuse me, my name's..." She held up a finger to cut him off and picked up the phone that had just started to ring.  
  
"Hello...Yes..." she began typing something into the computer screen in front of her, "Yes he is...Of course...Right away." She hung up the phone and then called out into the waiting room. "Mr Robertson? The doctor will see you now." She then turned her attention to Carter. "I'm sorry to keep you, sir. Can I help you?"  
  
"Hi. Yes. My name's John Carter. I have an appointment to see Dr Infante." He looked nervously around the waiting room, certain that everybody in the waiting room must be watching and listening. The receptionist typed his name into the computer and waited for his appointment to come up.  
  
"Okay Mr Carter, if you'd just like to take a seat a nurse will be along to see you shortly." She gave him a cheery smile then turned back to her work. Carter was just about to follow her instructions when he remembered the reason he had come this morning. He cleared his throat to regain the receptionist's attention, then in a lower tone of voice he answered her questioning look.  
  
"Um...they said I should bring this with me." He gestured to a brown paper bag that he had kept hidden under his jacket.  
  
"And what is that?" she asked with a slight smile on her face. If Carter wasn't so incredibly nervous he'd have said that she was doing this on purpose just to make him uncomfortable, but that would be unprofessional, wouldn't it? He gave a little nervous laugh, glanced over his shoulder, and answered in a low voice.  
  
"It's my...my specimen."  
  
"Specimen of what, sir?" she replied in a normal voice. Oh God! Carter whirled around to look at the other people sitting in the waiting room, certain that they must be listening to every word that was being said. He turned back to the receptionist and begged her with his eyes to be quiet.  
  
"You know," he said, signalling downwards with his eyes, "my 'specimen'." He had lowered his voice so that it was barely audible, but the girl behind the desk seemed to understand what he was saying and, taking pity on him, she lowered her voice and took the bag from him.  
  
"I'll make sure it gets down to the lab, Mr Carter. Now if you'll just take a seat somebody will be along to see you."  
  
"Thank you," he said, relieved, then walked the few steps to one of the armchairs scattered across the waiting area. He slumped into the chair, picked up a magazine from the table beside him and pretended to read it, but in reality he was watching the other people sitting in chairs.  
  
Both men and women were waiting; some obviously couples whilst others were, like him, by themselves. He wished Abby were here waiting with him so that he would feel a little less self-conscious, but he had told her that he could do this by himself and not to bother coming...Thank God she never listened to him! She was planning on coming along at the end of her shift, and he was willing to admit to himself now that he needed her with him, if only to stop his thoughts from wandering.  
  
Looking around over the top of his magazine his first thought was that the women all looked hopeful and excited whereas the men looked like they were just about to meet their executioner. He wondered if he looked like that, then realised that he must do. Since Abby had told him that the problem might be with him, that they couldn't have children because of him, he hadn't been able to think straight. It made him feel sort-of a failure as a man that he wasn't able to get his wife pregnant. After all, if Dr Luka "super-sperm" Kovac could impregnate women just by looking at them then he, John Carter, should at least be able to do the same after a year of trying at every opportunity...he had to stop thinking like this! God he wished Abby was here now. Just then a shadow was cast over his magazine calling his name, and he looked up to meet the gaze of a middle-aged nurse in a crisp uniform.  
  
"John Carter?" the nurse asked as she consulted the clipboard she held in her arms.  
  
"Um..." he shook himself out of his little reverie and smiled politely, "I'm sorry, yes, I'm John Carter."  
  
"If you could just follow me I'll take you to a room where you can get ready." She began walking down a corridor that ran beside the reception desk and Carter walked quickly after her. She stopped in front of a door and opened it to reveal a small room with a chair, a table with a television in the corner, and a small hatch in the wall. She motioned for Carter to enter the room and handed him a specimen cup as he entered.  
  
"When you've finished if you could just put the cup in the hatch, close the door and ring the bell to let us know you've finished. You can then return to the waiting area and the receptionist will call for you when the doctor is ready."   
  
Carter was a little confused as to what she expected him to do with the specimen cup. He had already handed one to the girl in reception and he couldn't see why they'd want another. He lifted an eyebrow and gave the nurse a puzzled look. "What am I supposed to do with this?" he asked.   
  
"I'm sorry, I should have asked if there were any problems," she said, obviously misjudging his confusion. "Do you want anything before you go in? Magazines? A video?"  
  
"What would I need a...oh." Carter suddenly clicked what was expected of him. This wasn't going to be any normal urine sample they were taking from him. Blushing several shades of red he quietly excused himself from the nurse and shut the door in her face, quickly getting on with his business and depositing the cup in the hatch before slinking out of the room and making his way back to the waiting room.   
  
This time Carter was certain that everybody was looking at him, and he was even more certain that they knew what he had been up to. Sitting down in the chair he slumped his shoulders in an attempt to make himself as small as possible, hoping that nobody would notice him in his mortification, then he closed his eyes and buried his face in his hands.  
  
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The next thing Carter knew somebody had slumped down into the seat beside him and placed a hand on his knee. He looked across and gave a relieved smile when he saw that it was Abby.  
  
"Hey babe," she said, placing a hand on the side of his face and pulling his face closer so that she could plant a kiss on his cheek. She let her hand linger on his cheek, rubbing it softly with her thumb to comfort him. "How are you feeling?"  
  
"I'm beginning to feel that I'm some sort of leper," he whispered. "Have you seen the way they're all looking at me? I may as well have a tattoo across my forehead saying 'Shooting Blanks'!"  
  
"Oh, stop being so melodramatic you big baby! Everybody in this room is in the same position as us. Why would they be looking at you in particular?"  
  
"Well. It's probably something to do with the fact that I was practically frogmarched into a little cubicle and made to give another...sample...then I had to come back out here and wait, knowing that everybody knew what I went out for. It's embarrassing...and not funny!" he added, seeing that Abby was trying hard not to laugh.  
  
"I know. You're right...did they offer to get you some dirty magazines?"  
  
"It isn't funny Abby!" he said, mortified that she found this so amusing.  
  
"You're right!" she said, tears pouring from her eyes as she tried unsuccessfully to hold her laughter in. "It's not funny at all! It's the complete opposite of funny...so did you go for 'Big Jugs' or 'Playboy'?"  
  
"Abby!" Carter looked around to see that, if he was being paranoid before, everybody in the room was definitely looking at him now as Abby was creased double in his lap, shaking with laughter. "I can't believe you find this so funny. I wouldn't laugh if it was you in the same position." This had the immediate effect of sobering Abby up. She stopped laughing and reached out to put her arm around Carter.  
  
"Oh John, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to laugh, but you know you look so funny when you're embarrassed. You go this lovely shade of red and you do this really cute thing with your feet...just like you're doing now." He looked down and saw that he was shuffling his feet up and down to some imaginary beat. He stopped suddenly as he became conscious of what he was doing, and crossed his hands between his knees to stop him from doing it again. He looked up at her with the puppy-dog look he knew made her melt and spoke softly.  
  
"So you're not laughing at me because you're disappointed?"  
  
"No," she replied, sitting back and ruffling his hair playfully. "I'm laughing at you because you're so cute! I told you this would probably turn out to be a lot of fuss about nothing...lets just wait until we speak to the doctor and she can tell us the results of the tests and where to go from there. No point worrying till then, is there?"  
  
"When did you become the level-headed one in this relationship?" he asked with admiration in his voice. She ignored his comment and continued in her best 'nurse talking to a scared little boy' voice.  
  
"So you promise to relax until we talk to the doctor?"  
  
"Okay nurse," he smiled.  
  
"Good." She picked up a magazine from the table and began to flip through the pages. "Now lets see if there are any quizzes in these magazines that can help me find my perfect man."  
  
"Hey!" Carter gave her a playful slap on the shoulder.  
  
"Just kidding," she smiled at him. Leaning against his shoulder she could feel him relax as they talked quietly about her shift at work, how the place was falling because Weaver was away, what time they were going over to Gamma's for the fundraiser the next week...everything and nothing. They had lost track of time and had almost forgotten where they were when the receptionist's voice cut into their thoughts.  
  
"Mr Carter? Dr Infante is ready to see you now."  
  
Abby looked over at Carter and squeezed his hand. "Are we ready to go?" she asked. He returned the pressure of her hand and smiled at her, then they both rose and followed the familiar path to the doctor's office.  
  
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(I'm sorry that after such a long wait I present you with such a short chapter. You'll be pleased...or possibly slightly disturbed...to know that I've been doing some research on the web and you'll be able to find out what's the matter with Carter's 'boys'! Next chapter will definitely be up by Friday. Writer's block be damned!) 


	3. Doctor's Orders

(It's taken me ages to update, but the problems I've been having sorting out my finances for uni have really been distracting me. This is only a short chapter for now to let you all know I'm still alive. I have actually done a little research for this part but I've probably misapplied most of what I learned! Enjoy anyway.)  
  
Part 3  
  
As they approached the doctor's office Carter began to hang back, walking ever slower as if approaching his executioner, so that by the time they arrived outside the office he had come to a complete stop. He watched as Abby knocked and entered the room but for some reason he couldn't get his feet to follow her, so he stood there and listened as she and the doctor shared pleasantries.  
  
"Hello Dr Infante," Abby greeted.  
  
"Abby! Good to see you again so soon," Dr Infante said, coming out from behind her desk to take Abby's hand in hers. "I thought I was seeing your husband today?"  
  
"Oh you are. He's right..." Abby turned around to introduce Carter only to find that he wasn't behind her as she thought. She turned back to the doctor and spoke in a confused voice. "He *was* right here. I'm sorry, I think he's just a little nervous about meeting you...you know, under the circumstances," she added in a whisper.  
  
"It's perfectly understandable," Dr Infante said softly. "We do find that some men react differently to women in this situation, so we try to take things as gently as possible. It's alright John," she raised her voice so that Carter could hear her in the hallway, "you can come in now. I don't bite!" Abby laughed softly, recognising the patient *I'm-dealing-with-a-child* voice she often had to use with Carter to get him to do something he didn't want to.  
  
Realising how irrational he was being Carter found the courage to enter the room. First he poked his head around the door frame to see the two women smiling at him indulgently, then seeing Abby trying not to laugh at his sheepish expression he slinked into the room.  
  
"You must be John," Dr Infante said, holding out her hand to greet Carter. "It's wonderful to finally be able to put a face to the name."  
  
"Same here," Carter said as he shook her hand briefly then let it drop.  
  
"Please take a seat," she said as she walked back behind her desk and sat down in her chair. "So how are you both feeling?"  
  
"Not too bad," Abby said  
  
"Nervous as hell," joined in Carter. Dr Infante laughed silently.  
  
"I understand that you're both anxious to find out the results of the tests. Let me start by repeating what I said yesterday to Abby, John. I don't think there is any reason why you shouldn't be able to conceive under natural circumstances. Tests of Abby's hormone and ovulation levels suggest that everything is in order, and tests we've run with the samples you provided us with are encouraging. With the first one..."  
  
"Why did I have to give two samples?" Carter asked, interrupting her. This was a question that had been bugging him for hours now and he wanted to get this out of the way before moving on to the results themselves.  
  
"Well, we wanted to be thorough for one thing. We used the first sample you provided us with to conduct a mucus-penetrance test. In a third of cases of infertility the problem lies in the incompatibility of the partners so we wanted to be sure that your sperm were capable of moving through the cervical mucus."  
  
"And?" He was squirming in his seat, finding this conversation decidedly uncomfortable. A quick glance at Abby told him that she was taking this all in, word for word.  
  
"Good news," the doctor smiled, "the two of you are perfectly compatible."  
  
Carter had been holding his breath while she spoke, and upon her finishing he blew the air out through his cheeks in relief. He looked across and smiled at Abby, who was also smiling back, but then realising that the doctor had not told them everything he turned his head back to face her. The question was on the tip of his tongue, but before he could ask it Abby beat him to it.  
  
"So what's the problem? Why can't we get pregnant?" she asked.  
  
"Are you sure you want Abby to be here for this?" Dr Infante asked Carter, putting off answering the question for a few moments. "Some people can find this a little personal."  
  
Carter reached out and took hold of Abby's hand, then taking a deep breath he spoke to the doctor. "Whatever you tell me I'm going to tell Abby anyway, only I may not be so honest so it's probably best she gets all the details from you anyway."  
  
"Alright then. The second set of tests confirmed that whilst you have a high sperm count and the morphology is normal, your motility is a little lower than we'd usually expect."  
  
Carter paused as he took in what he had just been told and digested it. He started to speak but couldn't get the words out, so he cleared his throat and spoke in a slightly squeaky voice. "Are you saying that I have *lazy sperm*?  
  
"Well, I question the use of the term 'lazy' but, essentially yes. Before ejaculation sperm generate the energy they need for motion primarily by burning fat, and after ejaculation they rely on the sugar fructose that is found in the seminal fluid. Your sperm, however, are burning up energy at a rapid rate and are not therefore generating enough for the journey ahead. They are, in effect, tired out before they even get to the egg."  
  
"What can we do?" Abby asked, gripping onto Carter's hand.  
  
"The protein carnitine facilitates the conversion form fat and sugar to energy, but recent studies suggest that carnitine levels are lower in the semen of men with low motility. By putting you on a dietary supplement called Proxeed I'd hope to see a significant improvement in motility within three to six months, and you should be able to conceive naturally."  
  
"That's great!" Carter said, truly smiling for the first time since yesterday. "So when can we get started on that?" he asked enthusiastically.  
  
"I'll write you a prescription before you leave, but there are just a few other questions I'd like to ask you first." She started to type notes into her computer as she asked the questions and didn't really raise her eyes to see his answers. "Are your sleep patterns irregular?"  
  
"Sort of, "Carter answered. "I've been working more regular shifts since I became an attending but I still have to pull an occasional double."  
  
"Uh huh," she typed something into the computer and then continued with her questions. "How about diet? Do you eat healthily, or junk food?"  
  
"I eat as well as I can when I'm at home, but it tends to be whatever I can grab when I'm at work."  
  
"Do you drink?"  
  
"No."  
  
"What about smoking?" She asked, not looking up from her computer screen and jotting down notes as he spoke.  
  
"No...well, yeah, but not regularly. A couple a day at most. It's not like I'm addicted or anything...Why, is that important?"  
  
"It could be," she said, jotting down some final notes and then removing her glasses to look at him. "Recent tests have shown that nicotine closes up the arteries that lead to the penis and can reduce the pressure of blood in the penis. Tell me, have you ever experienced Erectile Disfunction?"  
  
Carter's eyes widened and he held quickly turned on Abby. "You TOLD her?!" he exclaimed. "I can't believe you said that!" He turned back to Dr Infante and started to explain. "It was just this one time. It was six months ago, I'd been on call for 36 hours straight, I was exhausted. I'm amazed I even had the energy to get up the stairs, let alone get..."  
  
"JOHN!" Abby said in shock at what Carter had been about to say. He murmured an apology and slipped down into his chair, embarrassed. Dr Infante stepped in to calm the situation down.   
  
"Dr Carter, Abby has said nothing to me about your personal life. I'm just trying to piece together possible reasons for your inability to conceive. In an otherwise healthy male the most common factors tend to be diet or lifestyle. In addition to the Proxeed I'm going to ask you to give up smoking, as it is known that smokers who quit immediately improve their chances of producing healthy sperm and conceiving. I also want you to both look into your diet and revise your eating habits." She stood up and held out her hand to say good-bye and Carter and Abby rose also. "I've sent a message through to the front desk and your prescription should be ready to collect. I've also arranged for an information pack to be made up for you to take home and read. Please read through it carefully."  
  
"We will," Abby said, shaking Dr Infante's hand again. By this time they had reached the door and the doctor had opened it for them. "Thank-you so much for everything."  
  
"You're welcome. Don't forget to make an appointment for next week so we can discuss your schedule. It was lovely to meet you, John," she added, addressing Carter. "If you have any questions don't hesitate to call."  
  
"Thank you." He smiled tightly, still a little embarrassed by his little outburst and the situation as a whole. "Come on Abby, let's go."   
  
Taking hold of Abby's hand he quickly made his way towards the front desk to collect the prescription and largestack of information booklets that were waiting for them. Abby barely had time to turn and smile at the doctor over her shoulder before he whisked her away and out of the centre, and the next thing she knew they were in the car and on their way home.  
  
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	4. Talking through the problems

(Warning: This chapter contains an endorsement for Phish Food, possibly the finest flavour ice-cream ever invented. All hail Ben and Jerry! Enjoy)  
  
Part 4  
  
During the ride home Carter remained silent. Every now and then Abby would give his hand a reassuring squeeze and he would turn his head to give her a slight smile, but he would quickly retreat into his thoughts. He couldn't believe this was happening to him. Before he'd met Abby he had never really thought about having children, but at the same time he had assumed that he could have them if and when he decided to. Now here he was, married to the woman of his dreams, the only thing needed to make their relationship complete a child, and he found he couldn't give that to Abby. He felt powerless and he didn't like the feeling. Sighing heavily he pulled the car up outside their apartment building and turned off the engine, then walked to the passenger side to hand Abby out.  
  
They walked up the stairs to their apartment hand in hand, breaking contact only when Carter took his keys out of his pocket to open the door. He turned the key in the lock and turned the handle, but as usual the door stuck. He tried jiggling the handle a couple of times and kicking the bottom as Abby had told him but the door refused to move, causing him to become more and more irate. He was about to attack it with his shoulder when he felt Abby's hand on his arm stopping him.   
  
"Give it here," she said calmly, taking the keys out of his hand and easing her way in front of him. She turned the key in the lock and kicked the door slightly in the bottom corner, causing it to open easily. She held the door open and stood aside for him to enter.  
  
"You didn't have to do that, you know, I had the situation under control," he said sulkily, brushing past her and throwing his coat over the back of the couch and flopping himself down on it.  
  
"I know you did sweetie," she said indulgently as she put the keys on the hall table and joined him on the couch. "You were just about to kill the nasty door!"  
  
"Well maybe if I did we could finally get around to buying a new one," he said pointedly. "How many times do I have to tell you I'll call somebody in to fix a new door?"  
  
"And how many times do I have to tell you that there's no point in fixing a new door when we're not going to be in this apartment long-term. We don't want to be living in a second-floor apartment when we've got loads of kiddies running around our feet...and before you say anything we are *not* moving in with your grandmother," she added quickly.  
  
"I wasn't going to say anything about moving in with Gamma...although she has offered, and it is closer to the hospital..."  
  
"Dinner twice a week is more than enough for me. Don't get me wrong, I love Gamma to death, but for the sake of our marriage I think it's probably best that we keep exposure to your mother to a minimum. The woman just doesn't like me." She leaned against his shoulder and he lifted his arm to put around her, the tension between them slipping a little with the return of their usual banter.  
  
"Sure she does," he began, "she's just a little upset that she didn't get to throw one of those big society weddings she'd always dreamed about. Plus I think she might probably have liked to have found out from us rather than from a newspaper article."  
  
"She thinks I'm a gold-digger. I'm not good enough for her baby boy," she teased, turning her head to kiss the tip of his nose.  
  
"That's not true..." he defended his mother, although a little part of him acknowledged that this might be the case, so he quickly gave up and joined in Abby's laughter.  
  
"It *so* is," she laughed. "I bet she thought you only married me because you had to, and now she hates me because we're still married and she doesn't even have a grandchild to show for it!"  
  
Carter quickly sobered up at the mention of grandchildren. For a few minutes he had forgotten how sorry he felt for himself and had enjoyed his normal life with Abby, but now he was returned to his thoughts of how he had failed in his primary role as a man. He stopped laughing and stood up from the couch.  
  
"I'm going to make some coffee, you want one?" he asked, pulling himself free from her arms and walking over to the kitchen to put the kettle on to boil.  
  
"No thanks," she called after him, a little confused at his sudden change in behaviour. "I'm going to have to give up caffeine anyway when we get pregnant, and besides, these books say that high caffeine intake can slow down the chances of conceiving by up to 15 per cent..."  
  
Carter had been reaching into the cupboard to pull out two mugs whilst she had been speaking, and when she started reading the statistics from the booklets he slammed them down on the counter with such force that they shattered. "Do you think that we can ignore all that crap for one night and just get on with our lives???"  
  
Immediately ashamed by his outburst he slumped into a chair at the kitchen table and hid his face in his hands. Abby, equally concerned, put down the book she was flicking through and walked over to where he was sitting. She knelt down beside his chair and put her arms around him.  
  
"John, honey, what's wrong?"  
  
"I'm sorry Abby," he said, not taking his head out of his hands. Abby wasn't sure if it was this that made his voice sound muffled, or maybe the possibility that he was holding back tears.  
  
"What for?" she asked, putting her hand on his cheek and bringing his head around to face her. There were definitely tears in his eyes, and her heart went out to him.  
  
"For not being able to give you a baby. More than anything I want to be able to have children with you, and here we are talking to doctors, organising dieting schedules, quoting statistics..."  
  
"Yeah, well don't forget that 90 per cent of all statistics are made up," she joked softly, trying to lighten the mood.  
  
"Abby, I'm being serious!"  
  
"Okay, I won't joke." She looked away in thought for a moment and then turned back to face him. "Is that what all this was about?"  
  
"All what?"  
  
"All this pouting and ignoring me and slamming things around. You think that I'm upset because we haven't been able to have a baby right away?"  
  
"I guess I just assumed that since we were both ready it would happen," he confessed. "I mean, before you came along I never even considered the possibility of having children, but I never considered the probability of *not* having them either. They were just something that would happen when the time was right, and it just feels so right now and I can't believe we can't have them because of me...Am I making any sense?"  
  
"You are, but you're also being ridiculous as well. Did you go to see a different doctor than I did? Because the one I saw said that the only thing stopping us from conceiving was a bad habit and poor diet. If she had said that you had nothing swimming around in there then I would admit we have a problem," she joked, eliciting a little smile from him, "but these are all things that can be fixed. I'm going in next week to talk about my fertility schedule, learn how to take my temperature properly to find my most fertile periods and construct the charts, and I bet you within no time we'll have a gaggle of little Carters running around and driving us crazy...and even if we don't, do you honestly think that it would change the way I feel about you? I love you John Carter," she said forcibly, "and all the lazy sperm in the world aren't going to change that!"  
  
He laughed outright at this. Somehow Abby always seemed to have the right words to make him see how ridiculous he was being. There was a time when it was always him who had to talk Abby into being more open, but over the past year their relationship had grown so much more equal. They complemented each other, each one's strengths making up for the other's weaknesses. As he was musing on this Abby rose from her kneeling position and held out her hand to him.  
  
"Come on," she said, pulling him up from his seated position and dragging him back over to the couch. "What you need is a tub of ice cream and a mindless night in front of the television watching total rubbish to take your mind off things." She pushed him down onto the couch and went to the kitchen, returning moments later with a tub of Phish Food and a spoon.  
  
"Only one spoon?" he questioned, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"Did I forget to mention that part of the fun would be feeding your beautiful wife?" she said suggestively, cuddling up close to him on the couch and holding out the spoon and ice cream.  
  
"As long as my 'beautiful wife' returns the favour."  
  
"I think that can be arranged!"  
  
They shared the ice cream as they watched some quiz show, occasionally shouting out the answers to a guy who obviously had no clue and eventually guessed wrongly that the capitol of Scotland was London.  
  
"How can people this dumb get onto television?" Carter asked, exasperated.  
  
"Hmm?" Abby was too busy planting soft kisses on his cheek and along his jaw line. The ice cream had long been neglected.  
  
"I mean do they not even watch the news?" Carter continued with his rant. "They had to have studied Geography in High School, right?"  
  
"Whatever you say." She opened the top buttons of his shirt and ran her hand down his chest. "So you want to go make a baby, Dr Carter?" she asked seductively, kissing down his neck and continuing to slowly unbutton his shirt.  
  
"Abby," he groaned, "it's not that I'm not enjoying what you're doing...very much in fact...but I'm not in the mood for all that elevated, angled mumbo-jumbo. Couldn't we just crash and read all the stuff in the morning?" He tried unsuccessfully to pull away from her but she was not to be put off.  
  
"Well then, how about we look on this as a trial-run?"  
  
"A trial-run?" he asked breathlessly. It was hard to concentrate when Abby was running her hand down his chest like that.  
  
"Yes, a trial-run...a bit of practice...how else will we know if we're doing it right when we actually do start trying?"  
  
"You mean we haven't been doing it right the last fifteen months?" he laughed softly against her lips. She had raised herself on her knees so that she was straddling him at this point, hands on his shoulders as she kissed his forehead, his nose, his lips.  
  
"Are you questioning my logic?" she asked, pulling back to look at him mock-sternly.  
  
"Now why would I do that?" He pulled her back down to his chest and kissed her softly. They remained on the couch for a few minutes just kissing and cuddling before they both subconsciously started to deepen the kiss, each wanting something more. Carter rose from the couch and lifted Abby in his arms, never breaking contact with her lips as he carried her to their bedroom and laid her on the bed. He let go of her only long enough to remove the rest of his clothes, and then he quickly rejoined her on the bed to continue where he left off...  
  
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"Feeling better now?" she asked as she lay against his chest. Carter tightened his arms around her and planted a kiss on the top of her head.  
  
"Absolutely wonderful," he sighed contentedly, "and not just because of what we've just done!" he added when he heard her laugh. "The last 24 hours have just been so...*surreal* I guess...and it's nice to have the pressure off for a little while. Thank you."  
  
"For what?"  
  
"For calling me on being such an idiot." He felt her smile against his chest and he snuggled closer against her.  
  
"You're welcome," she said quietly. "Just don't let it happen again."   
  
"I won't." He kissed her forehead, and felt her breathing begin to slow.  
  
"Don't forget we both have early shifts tomorrow," she mumbled tiredly.  
  
"I won't."  
  
"And we have to hand the invitations out." Her last words were barely audible, and as soon as they were out of her mouth Carter knew that she was asleep.  
  
He lay there for a few minutes just watching her. She looked so beautiful and peaceful, as if she had never had any worries in her life. Maybe she was right. Maybe it wasn't going to be so bad after all. They were together, they were in love, and if they had a baby all the better. In the meanwhile he would carry on as normal, and enjoy the trying.  
  
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(I don't want to speak too soon, but I think I may have found my flow again. Fingers crossed. Please review if you've enjoyed it, or if there's anything you'd like to see happen. Em) 


	5. Fluff for breakfast

Part 5  
  
Abby woke the next morning and lazily reached out for Carter, hoping to spend a few minutes cuddling up to him before they both had to get up for an 8 o'clock shift, but her arm cut through the air and hit the empty space in the bed where he usually lay. She called out his name sleepily but received no reply, so she slowly opened her eyes and tried to focus on the flashing red numbers of the clock on the nightstand. She groaned as she saw what time it was.  
  
*6.32*   
  
They didn't have to be up for at least another half hour, and much as she loved John Carter she was the first to admit that it was next to impossible to get him out of bed before the alarm had gone off. So where was he? She pulled herself into a seated position and again called out his name as she cast her eyes around the room for some sign of his whereabouts, but as before there was no reply. Sighing she swung her legs over the edge of the bed and picked up Carter's discarded shirt from the floor, shrugging it on and doing up the buttons as she set off in search of him.  
  
As she moved out of the bedroom into the living room the sound of somebody singing drifted over to her from the kitchen. Following the direction of the singing she found Carter standing barefoot in front of the stove, stirring something in the frying pan and occasionally checking on something else under the grill. He was wearing only a pair of trousers and had a tea-towel thrown over one shoulder, partially covering his naked chest, and Abby stood still for a moment just admiring him as he sang along to The Beatles and swayed his hips in time to the music.  
  
"Somebody's a bit perky this morning!" she said suddenly, causing him to whirl around quickly with the frying pan and spatula still in his hands.  
  
"Jeez, Abby, you scared the crap out of me!" He had practically jumped out of his skin and Abby couldn't help but laugh a little at the expression on his face. He gave a little scowl as if he were angry with her, although they both knew he wasn't really.  
  
"I'm sorry babe," she said, making a little pouty face. He quickly lost the angry look on his face as he choked back his laughter and smiled at her. "So what are you doing up so early?" she asked, returning his smile.  
  
"A guy can't get up early to make his wife breakfast?" he said light-heartedly, turning back to the stove. "Bacon and eggs ok for you?"  
  
"Wow, I must have been better last night than I thought!" she joked, coming up behind him and wrapping her arms around his waist, peeking over his shoulder as he pulled the bacon out from under the grill. She tried to reach out a hand to sneak a piece without him seeing but he caught her and slapped her hand away playfully. "Hey!" she said, stepping back from him and rubbing her hand. "That really hurt!"   
  
"No picking," he admonished, waving the spatula in her face. "Now sit your cute butt at that table while I get the toast."  
  
Abby did as she was told and sat down at the table, appreciating for the first time how much effort Carter had gone to. Fresh flowers had been put in a vase in the centre of the table and the kitchen, despite the fact Carter had been cooking, was spotless. He had even remembered to put the salt and pepper on the table, something she had to constantly remind him of because he never put enough in his cooking. She was just beginning to wonder what had gotten into her husband when she heard him switch off the stove and divide the contents of the pan onto two plates.  
  
"A girl could get used to this," she smiled as he placed a plate in front of her and leaned forward to kiss her softly on the lips.  
  
"That's sort of what I had in mind," he said as he took his seat next to her, giving her a quick flash of a grin and a wink as he bit into his toast. She smiled back and they spent the next few minutes eating their breakfast in silence. When they were done Carter rose from the table and took the dishes to the sink; Abby tried to get up to help but he just pushed her back down into her seat and wagged a finger at her to tell her to stop. Abby watched him move around the kitchen, whistling a tune and putting things away, until finally she couldn't take it anymore. She had to know what was going on...   
  
"What are you doing, Carter?" She practically shouted at him in her frustration, shocking him for the second time that day. He turned to face her with the dishcloth in his hand.  
  
"Cleaning the dishes?" he asked in a puzzled voice, not quite understanding the question but knowing that he was in trouble if she was calling him 'Carter'.  
  
"Not now," she rolled her eyes, "...with this whole breakfast thing."  
  
"You didn't like the breakfast?"  
  
"I *loved* the breakfast," she said, calming down as she spoke. God he was cute when he was confused! "I'm just curious where this bright and cheery Carter came from. I've not seen him in a while and I've kind of missed him."   
  
Watching her as she blushed slightly Carter put down the dishcloth and walked over to her, putting his hands gently on her shoulders and pulling her up to face him. They looked into each other's eyes for a brief second before they both closed the gap, their lips meeting in a deep and lingering kiss.  
  
"Well," he said, pulling away from the kiss and reaching out a hand to tame Abby's morning hair, "I think he's back. He's been acting like a total dick the last couple of days and he's willing to do whatever it takes to make it up to you."  
  
"Does that include reading the booklets Dr Infante gave us..." Carter groaned, "...and promising me that you won't dismiss what she said because you don't like it?" She had raised her voice slightly to be heard over his protestations, and put her hands on both sides of his face to force him to look her in the eye. He tried to break eye contact but she wasn't letting go, so he eventually gave up.  
  
"Okay," he sighed. "I'll take them in to work with me and we can read through them on our break."  
  
"Good boy," she said, standing on her toes to kiss the tip of his nose then twisting herself out of his embrace. "Now I need to go take a shower."  
  
"You can say that again!" he called out as she walked away.  
  
"Hey!" she paused in the doorway to look at him. "Be nice, or I may find that I'd rather spend my lunch-break with Susan and you'd be left all alone in that empty exam room..."   
  
She left the sentence hanging, knowing that Carter would never jeopardise one of their stolen moments in the ER! She left him to get their bags together for work and tidy up as she stepped into the shower, revelling in the sensation of the warm water cascading down her back. If only she could stay in here forever and not have to worry about going to work, she thought...but she knew it would become very boring very quickly, and she would miss the hustle-and-bustle eventually! She sighed as she shut off the shower and stepped out, wrapping a towel around herself and entering the bedroom to get ready for work...  
  
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(That may be it for a while. I move back up to uni on Sunday and have to get a phone-line installed in my room so I don't know when I'll be able to post again. I'll try to get something up by next week, but hopefully this little bit of fluff will be enough to keep you going. Thanks for all the great reviews: they are very much appreciated and they help me improve. Em) 


	6. She finally writes another chapter and t...

(Hey all! Sorry it has taken me so long to update but Grad work is so much more trouble than undergrad. This chapter may seem a little rushed as I didn't beta it so if there are any mistakes please put it down to the fact that I was so desperate to get a chapter out for you all that I forgot my usual high standards...Ha! Anyway I'm back online now, praise the lord, so I hope to be able to update fairly regularly, and am able once more to respond to comments. Thanks for all the lovely reviews and emails you have been sending, and I hope you enjoy!)  
  
Part 6  
  
Susan Lewis was bored. Nothing resembling a trauma had come in for at least six hours, the board was empty, and the only person in chairs was one of the new intake of med students who obviously didn't see the point in going home and who had stretched out across several of the seats. She couldn't help but laugh at this picture. It reminded her so much of Carter on his first day at county: the enthusiasm to learn, the total lack of any practical knowledge, the exhaustion causing them to fall asleep on the most uncomfortable piece of furniture in the entire building...speaking of Carter, where was he? She was supposed to be meeting him for lunch to discuss the new med-school applications and the empty feeling in her stomach told her that it was definitely time for them to get to work on them. She lifted her chin from her hands where she had been resting it and scanned the admit area for a sign of her fellow doctor, but she couldn't see him anywhere. The place was deserted. She turned her head to one side to see Frank staring intently at the computer screen and typing something in carefully with one finger.  
  
"Hey Frank," she called over to him, "do you know where Carter is?"  
  
"How should I know?" the desk clerk replied gruffly, obviously upset at the interruption and not bothering to look up at her. "He said something about waiting for some results and then wandered off."  
  
"Well did you see where he went?"  
  
"Nope."  
  
"Maybe he went down to the cafeteria," she mused to herself, then looked back at Frank. "What do you think?"  
  
"Do I look like his mother?" he barked in reply, causing Susan to jump slightly.   
  
"God I hope not for his children's sake," she whispered under her breath, turning around on the heel of her foot to set off in search of Carter. "I'm going to go look for him. If anybody asks I've gone over to Doc's," she called out over her shoulder as she went. Frank dismissed her with a grunt and went back to typing away at the computer. Susan started to head out the double-doors to the ambulance bay when she saw Chen walking back across the street towards her.   
  
"Hey Susan," the young doctor called out to her politely.  
  
"Hey Deb," Susan called back. "Listen, have you just come back from Doc Magoo's? I'm looking for Carter and I thought that maybe he might have gone over there to grab a bit of lunch. Was he over there?"  
  
"Not as far as I saw...but I only ran in quickly to grab a sandwich. He might have been in one of the corner booths and I didn't see him..." she suggested hopefully.  
  
"No, he would have said 'hi' if he'd seen you," Susan sighed. Where could he be? If he was going to be away for a long space of time then surely he would have told somebody where he was going? She remained in thought like this for a few moments when she realised that she had not spoken for a while, and that Chen was now regarding her with a concerned look on her face. "I'm sorry, Deb," she said, shaking herself from her trance. "Thanks for your help."  
  
"It's no problem, but I didn't really do anything."  
  
"You saved me a trip over to Doc's!" Susan joked. "I guess I'll just have to resort to plan B and go down to the Cafeteria. He has to be in this hospital somewhere!"  
  
The two women laughed and turned to walk back into the hospital, Deb turning left to enter the lounge and Susan carrying on down to the Cafeteria. A quick survey told her that he wasn't in the cafeteria...nor was he in the lounge, or the exam rooms, or up on the roof...It was official. Carter had vanished from the face of the planet!  
  
After nearly half an hour of fruitless searching Susan decided to call it quits and go to get some lunch. Carter was bound to turn up eventually, and when he did she was going to get him for leaving her to deal with these applications by herself: maybe she could talk to Kerry about the desperate shortage of attendings on the night shifts! She set off down the corridor with a wicked smile on her face and was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't notice a huddled figure poke its head out from behind the door of a supply closet and attempt to dash across the hall...  
  
"Oh, excuse me...Hey, there you are!" she exclaimed, realising that the person she had just ran into was the elusive Carter. "I've been looking for you everywhere. Where did you disappear to?"  
  
"Susan!" he replied, surprised. "I...uh...I didn't see you there. How are you?" He glanced nervously over his shoulder and started to edge down the corridor, hoping that Susan would follow him.  
  
"How am I?" she asked rhetorically, remaining exactly where she was. "I'm pissed, that's how I am! I've been walking all over this hospital looking for you. We were supposed to meet for lunch, remember?"  
  
"Lunch?" Carter said distractedly, again casting a quick look back at the supply closet before returning his eyes to Susan. There was something strange about him that she couldn't put her finger on, but she was still too annoyed at him to think about that now.  
  
"You were going to help me sort through the med-school applications, weed out the weaker candidates. I had just about given up on ever finding you and was about to get some lunch. When I get back we're going to sit down and get these done; I don't want to be here late still reading through these things!"  
  
"Sure, sure, I'm right on it...in fact, how about we go to the lounge and get started now?" Casting one final glance over his shoulder Carter took hold of Susan's arm and began to steer her down the corridor at a rather rapid rate. Susan followed him for a few steps but then stopped abruptly:  
  
"What is up with you?" she asked, exasperated. Carter began apologising for himself when Abby came tearing down the hallway from behind them, her head bent low as if she didn't want to be seen. Just as she was about to pass Susan noticed her and held out her hand to stop her.  
  
"Abby, thank goodness you're here. Could you please tell me what is going on with this husband of yours? He forgets about a lunch-date we have then comes running out of a closet unable to string a coherent sentence together...are you OK?" she asked, taking in Abby's dishevelled appearance. "You look like you're not getting enough sleep. You've got your sweater on inside out as well; you get dressed in the dark or something!" she joked. Abby blushed a bright crimson and mumbled something incoherent as she took off the sweater and put it back on the right way round.  
  
Susan looked at both Carter and Abby and started to put two and two together...the untidy appearance, the guilty glances, buttons done up wrong, the fact they were both blushing furiously...  
  
"OH MY GOD!" Susan cried, her hands clasped over her mouth in disbelief. "You guys were doing *it* in there?" she whispered, pointing back to the closet.  
  
"I plead the Fifth," Abby said, burying her face into Carter's shirt to hide her blushes.  
  
"Well I'm sorry to interrupt your sordid little tryst," Susan said, enjoying the embarrassed look on their faces, "but I'm going to have to steal your husband away from you. We really do have to get going on those med-school applications, Carter."  
  
"Okay I'll be right there...Oh, and Susan?" Susan had nodded her acceptance of this and started to head off in the direction of the Lounge when Carter called her back. She stopped and turned to wait for him to say what he had stopped her for. Carter looked cautiously around him and walked over to her, speaking low so that she could only just hear him. "Do you think you could keep this quiet for me? I know Abby and I are married, but there's something a little embarrassing about getting caught making out with your wife in a supply closet. Nobody would take me seriously again," he pleaded.  
  
"I'm offended that you even feel you have to ask me that," Susan replied, affecting a hurt tone and placing her hand over her heart as she tried to sound sincere. "You know you can trust me."  
  
"I'm sorry, it was stupid of me to ask. Thank you Susan."  
  
"No problem, Carter. I'm the soul of discretion!"  
  
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Carter slumped into a booth at Doc Magoo's and fixed a cold stare on the woman sitting opposite him. Susan began to fidget uncomfortably under his level gaze and smiled guiltily. He looked very angry and she had a pretty good idea why. When she couldn't bear his silence anymore she threw her arms up in the air and practically screamed at him in exasperation.  
  
"WHAT?"  
  
"Why did I listen to you? 'You know you can trust me'" he said, mimicking her voice. "'I'm the soul of discretion.' I may as well have taken out an ad in the Tribune," he muttered to himself.  
  
"Hey mister, I'll have you know that I'm one of the most discreet people in that hospital. Everything you said to me was in the strictest confidence."  
  
"If you're so discreet then how come all the nurses were laughing at me and pointing on my way over here?"  
  
Susan couldn't help but laugh aloud at this, earning herself an extra long glare from Carter. She quickly stopped laughing and attempted to keep her features straight. When she no longer felt in danger of dissolving into fits of laughter she returned Carter's look and immediately went on the defensive.   
  
"Don't go blaming me for this one Carter. Ever stop to think that maybe you and your wife are the ones who aren't quite discreet? I wasn't the only person to notice that the two of you were both conveniently missing at the same time," she insinuated.  
  
"But you were the only person to catch us walking out of the closet and swear never to tell a living soul what you saw," he countered.  
  
"I never swore..." she said quickly, then realising what she had said she silently kicked herself.  
  
"I knew it was you!" Carter shouted triumphantly. "You just couldn't resist spreading a little gossip could you?"  
  
"Well maybe I wouldn't have to resort to gossip and speculation if you'd talk to me and tell me what's going on. You and Abby have been acting really strange recently and I'm a little worried."  
  
"How have we been strange?"  
  
"Well for one thing you've never skipped work to have a quick fumble in the closet before, even when you were newlyweds!" she joked, causing  
  
"Okay, if I tell you do you promise not to tell anybody?"  
  
"I promise," she said with a smile, making a sign of locking her mouth and throwing away the key.  
  
"I mean it Susan!" Carter said forcefully, "You can't tell anybody about this."  
  
Susan looked at his face and realised from his look that this really was one time when she would have to be serious. She sobered up immediately and looked him directly in the eyes. "I promise."  
  
Carter took a deep breath then spoke in a rush. "Abby and I are trying for a baby."  
  
"And you thought a broom closet was about as good a place to start as any?"  
  
"Susan!"  
  
"Sorry, couldn't resist that one," she said sheepishly. "So how long have you been trying?"  
  
"A while now, but there have been...complications...you don't want to hear about it," he said dismissively, taking one of the applications from the top of the pile and starting to look over it. He gave a laugh and held it out to Susan. "This one is definitely going in the 'Reject' pile. Says he wants to be a doctor because his ex-girlfriend used to watch Chicago Hope and he thought it looked fun!"  
  
"What sort of complications?" she asked, not put off by his attempts to change the subject.  
  
Carter sighed and tossed aside the form. "I'd really rather not talk about it, Susan. It's still a sensitive subject." He picked up another form and Susan watched him for a moment, debating whether to continue the conversation, but seeing that Carter was intently reading through the forms she decided against it. She had embarrassed him enough today already. She picked up one of the forms from the pile and started to read through them with Carter, quickly sorting them into a pile of Yes, No's and Maybe's. When they were finished they picked up their pile of forms and headed back across the road to the hospital. When they got to the doors Carter stopped and turned to Susan, holding out his hand to shake hers.  
  
"Thanks for not pushing the point just now, Susan. I'm just a little uncomfortable with discussing this sort of thing. I don't like to keep things from a friend but you know how it is. Right?" He looked at her expectantly and Susan allowed a smile to cross her face.  
  
"It's okay Carter. When you're ready to talk, we'll talk. Besides," she added with a little laugh, "you don't think Abby won't tell me eventually anyway?"  
  
  
(There it is. Not much to show for a month's absence is it! Hopefully the next instalment will be better. I've actually been working on a load of other stories and, believe it or not, I do have uni work that sadly takes precedence. I'll do my utmost to continue this, though, if continuation is still wanted. Remember people, any encouragement or constructive criticism you send is an incentive to write more! Em) 


	7. A brief interlude

(Before I say anything else I want everybody to repeat after me: "All Hail Joycelyn Solo!" She took pity on a poor, isolated English girl whose parents treat her like a modern-day-Cinderella and deprive her of Digital/Satellite, thus ensuring she would have to wait until February for Season 9. Thanks to her I have seen the first four episodes and, after a week of watching them ad nauseum, I have been inspired to write a new chapter to this fic. It is only filler at this stage, but at least it is an update! Hope you enjoy it nevertheless, and if you do or don't let me know.)  
  
Part 7  
  
"Hey Sweetie." Abby rested a hand on Carter's shoulder and leant down to kiss the top of his head as he sat at the table in the lounge, pouring over an article in a medical journal.  
  
"Hey," he replied, raising his head slightly to smile at her. "You off?"  
  
"Yeah," she groaned wearily. One of the perks of being Nurse Manager. You get to finish your shift on time so that you can go home and spend hours working on the nursing schedules."  
  
"I'm sorry babe," Carter said sympathetically, putting his arm around her waist and pulling her closer to his side. "I'd help you if I could."  
  
"I know you would," she said softly, smoothing down the hair that was sticking up on top of his head. You want me to wait for you?"  
  
"I wouldn't bother. I'm waiting on some patients, plus I have to meet with Kerry before the changeover and then I get to review all the morning charts before I sign off on them…one of the perks of being an Attending," he joked.  
  
Abby chuckled"So what time do you think you'll be home?"  
  
Carter looked down for a second as he thought about this, then he sighed tiredly as he looked back up to answer her. "Not for another couple of hours yet. You should go home and get some rest. You're looking a little tired."  
  
"Thank you very much!" Abby pretended to take offence and punched him lightly on the arm before dropping into his lap and throwing her arms around his neck.  
  
"What are you doing?" Carter laughed, surprised by her sudden action and a little winded as well.  
  
"Well," Abby lowered her face to his and started to kiss along his jaw line, "if my husband is going to be stuck inside this hospital without me for the next few hours I want to give him some happy thoughts to keep him going." She continued to kiss down his neck, running her hand through his hair as she did, and Carter more than willingly began to return her kisses. They both became lost in the moment as the kiss began to increase in intensity, but after a time Carter stopped and tried to pull away.  
  
Abby let out a little groan of dissatisfaction as he pushed her away. "Why did you stop?" she pouted.  
  
"We can't do this here, Abby. Why do you always do this to me?"  
  
"Do what?"  
  
"Make me wish that this hospital didn't exist! You wait until the end of your shift to get me excited when you know that I'll be here by myself for another few hours with nothing to do about it. It's very distracting, you know."  
  
"I can go and see if the supply closet is free, if you like," she teased, leaning close to whisper suggestively in his ear.   
  
Carter laughed and put her gently off his lap. "Much as I'd love to, I have to get back to work eventually! My break is over soon, and Susan would have a field day if she caught us twice in one day."  
  
"Okay, if you're going to be reasonable about it!" Abby said, reluctantly leaving Carter's arms and walking over to her locker to put her coat on. When she finished she turned to say 'goodbye' and found that Carter was once more engrossed in the journal that lay open on the table. She stood for a moment, smiling indulgently at the look of concentration on his face that made him look like a little boy studying, then walked over to the table and laid a hand on his arm.  
  
"What'ya reading?" she asked in a singsong voice, looking over his shoulder  
  
"An article," he teased.  
  
"I can see that," she groaned. "Why?"  
  
"Because I received the distinct impression from my wife that unless I read these magazines I'd be taking cold showers for the next month."  
  
"You're reading Dr Infante's leaflets?" she asked, surprised.  
  
"Didn't I say I would?"  
  
"You did, but I didn't believe you. Thank you John!" she squealed, throwing her arms around his neck once more and nearly choking the breath out of him.  
  
"What was that for?" he asked when she eventually released her hold on him.  
  
"For being so wonderful," she answered. "I know you're not crazy about this whole thing, but it means so much to me that you're making the effort. It would be so easy for you to give up on us and walk away but you're doing this so…thank you!" Abby could feel the tears starting to rise to her eyes so she turned away and wiped at them with the back of her hand. No matter how open she was about her emotions now, she still wasn't comfortable with crying in front of other people…even Carter.  
  
Carter, noticing the change in her voice stood up and walked over to her. He placed his hands on her shoulders and turned her around to face him. "I would never give up on us," he said softly, picking up a loose strand of hair and tucking it behind her ear. "You are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I can't imagine my life without you. I'm not just reading these leaflets to humour you; I'm reading them because there is nothing else I can think of to make my life more complete than to have a baby with you. I love you, and I will always love you…whether we have a baby or not."  
  
By this time Abby was in tears and willingly gave in when Carter pulled her into an embrace. She snuggled against his chest until her sobs had subsided, then she pulled back to smile at him.  
  
"Not even pregnant yet and I'm already emotional!" she kidded, wiping away the last of her tears. Carter smiled back at her and reached a hand up to cup her cheek, smoothing away one stray tear with his thumb.   
  
"You're beautiful," he whispered, placing a soft kiss on her lips. "I'll see if I can get Deb to cover the end of my shift and I'll take you home…"  
  
"Don't be silly," Abby sniffed, pulling away from him and straightening herself up. "I'm fine now and I certainly don't need your help to find the El station. Besides, the sooner you get back to work the sooner you'll finish, then maybe you and I can finish what we started earlier…"  
  
"Okay," Carter relented, "just be careful, and promise me you won't work too hard on those schedules."  
  
"Humph, like that's going to happen!" she scoffed. "I've got enough to do with your mother visiting next week and planning this anniversary party without…dammit!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"I forgot to bring the invitations in. I can't believe I didn't remember until now!"  
  
"Well, we'll just have to bring them in tomorrow, won't we?" he reasoned. "It's not for another couple of weeks yet so I'm sure one day won't make any difference. And as for my mother, how many times do I have to tell you? If you ignore her she'll go away!"  
  
Abby laughed and moved towards the door. "That's easier said than done and you know it, but I'll try."  
  
"That's my girl," Carter said, taking hold of Abby's hand and walking with her out of the exit and into the ambulance bay. "Are you sure you're good to get home by yourself?"  
  
"I'll be fine," she said patiently. "I'll be lonely, but I'll be fine."  
  
"If you're sure…" Carter began, uncertainly.  
  
"I'm sure. Now get down here and give me a proper goodbye."   
  
Carter was more than happy to oblige, smiling as he drew her into his arms and lowered his head to capture her lips in one long, lingering kiss. For a moment they again felt as if the world around them were melting away, until the sound of distant sirens interrupted their thoughts and brought them back to reality.  
  
"Hey Carter! Stab wound coming in. ETA three minutes!"  
  
Carter groaned and pulled back from the kiss. He held up a hand to acknowledge Chuni's holler, then leaned his forehead against Abby's. "Guess I'd better get back to work," he sighed.  
  
"Yes you do," she said softly, standing on her tiptoes and placing a gentle kiss on his lips.  
  
"I love you," he said against her lips.  
  
"I love you too…now get over there and save some lives!"  
  
They shared a smile and started to walk in opposite directions, Carter towards the hospital and Abby towards the El station. Carter continued to watch her for as long as he could, but just as she was turning the corner to leave the ambulance bay an ambulance pulled in and stopped in front of the entrance. Carter sighed inwardly, and then shook himself back into 'Doctor-Mode' as the doors to the ambulance flew open and the gurney was brought out.  
  
"Give me the bullet!"  
  
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(I've decided that I'm not going to promise to have anything written by a certain date as I never stick to deadlines. I'm going to try for once a week updates but you never know when inspiration will strike! In the meanwhile thanks to everybody who reviewed and emailed me: feedback always appreciated. And to those of you who asked, you have no need to worry about this fic. I am incapable of writing angst so this story will be fluff all the way. Em) 


	8. Mrs Carter on the Warpath

(I finally updated! That's right, I'm not dead…although with the streaming cold I have at the moment I wish I were! Anyway, I am swamped with Uni work at the moment and possibly for a long while in the future which is why I have been out of the loop, but my New Year's Resolution is to spend at least one hour each day writing on all the various little projects I have started then abandoned. To show my good intentions I have two new chapters to present you with, one of which you get today and one tomorrow. Hope I haven't lost my touch in the time I've been away. Em)  
  
Part 8  
  
"I'm going to kill her."  
  
"Now I'm sure it's not as bad as all that…"  
  
"I swear to God, Susan, the woman is driving me up the wall. If I have to hear one more time how 'You can't throw a party and not invite Mrs So-and-So' then I'll find some way of slipping a *very* strong sedative into her coffee. I don't care what John thinks!"  
  
Susan looked up from the magazine she had just been reading and laughed softly. "Something tells me that relations between you and the lovely Eleanor Carter haven't improved over the past few weeks."  
  
"You can say that again," Abby said emphatically, throwing herself onto the couch in the doctor's lounge and thrusting her hands into her pockets. "The disappointment practically oozes from the woman every time she so much as looks at me. As she takes great delight in telling me, 'she had such plans for her John' and I obviously wasn't a part of them."  
  
"Maybe she'll be better once this whole anniversary thing is out of the way," Susan suggested whilst laughing at Abby's almost perfect imitation of her mother-in-law.  
  
"You mean I'll magically become the society hostess she always wanted in the family and she'll finally accept me?" Abby Laughed, then shook her head. "No, I know what her problem is. As far as she's concerned the only reason John could possibly have married me was if I was pregnant and he was doing the right thing. That woman won't be happy until I provide her with a precious Carter heir and justify my existence within the family!"  
  
Susan stopped laughing and regarded her friend carefully for a moment. She knew that Abby and Carter had been trying to conceive for a while now and had been less than successful, and something about Abby's tone told her that they had had a bit of a setback recently.  
  
"Is there anything you want to talk about?"  
  
"It's nothing," Abby said, trying to brush off the subject.  
  
"Don't tell me it's nothing! I happen to know that more than anything you want to have a baby, yet here you are laughing about carrying on the Carter name as if it's some kind of chore…are you sure you don't want to talk about it?"  
  
Abby shook her head again and laughed. "I have to laugh or I'll cry…I had my period this morning," she explained.  
  
"Oh Abby!" Susan moved from her seat at the table and went to sit on the couch next to Abby, who carried on quickly.   
  
"I don't know what I was expecting. We only started trying seriously about a month ago, taking temperatures and stuff like that, then I was a couple of days late and I found myself thinking that maybe this could be it. I know it was too soon, but that still doesn't stop you hoping does it?" She stopped talking and wiped away a tear with her sleeve. Susan put an arm around her shoulder and rubbed it gently.  
  
"Have you talked to Carter about this?"  
  
"Not yet. I wanted to be able to announce it at the party and see the look on his face, but I feel so stupid now."  
  
"Well, you should. It's not good to keep this all to yourself, especially when you have a husband who would do anything for you."  
  
"Yeah, well that husband is the reason I have the mother-in-law from hell so don't be so quick to paint him a saint!" Abby said, pulling herself together and pointing a finger at Susan, who laughed.  
  
"Good to see that sense of humour hasn't left you!"  
  
"No point letting it get me down. No matter how miserable I am the venerable Mrs Carter will always find some way of making me feel that little bit lower so I may as well just do as John says. Ignore her."  
  
"Something tells me that might be easier said than done," Susan said, rising from her seat and moving towards the door. "Well, we'd better be getting back to work, I suppose. Are you coming?"  
  
"Uugh! Nothing like a good old case of projectile vomiting to make you forget about your family problems! " Abby groaned as she pulled herself off of the couch and joined Susan at the door, the two women leaving the room together joined in laughter. As they walked over to the admit desk Abby casually cast a glance across to the entrance and stopped dead in her tracks at what she saw. "Oh my God!"  
  
"What?" Susan looked over her shoulder and tried to see what it was that had had this effect.  
  
"Quick, hide me!" Abby ducked behind the desk and peeked over the top, trying to make herself appear as small as possible.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"It's John's mother," Abby hissed. "She said something about meeting for lunch to discuss arrangements but I thought I'd managed to brush her off. If she sees me she's going to want to start lecturing me on the benefits of a sit-down dinner over a buffet, or the correct way to greet guests! Please, Susan, I just want to get away from her for five minutes!"  
  
"Say no more," Susan said knowingly, picking up a chart from the desk beside her. "I was just going to go check up on a patient I left in the suture room anyway. Want to come hide with me?"  
  
"Do I ever!" Abby sighed gratefully and started off down the hall after Susan, grabbing the med student standing at the desk by the arm and whispering in her ear as she went. "If a woman comes along asking for me, you haven't seen me, okay?"  
  
"But I have," Erin said, obviously not getting the point. Abby raised her eyes to heaven and explained patiently:  
  
"Pretend you haven't. A woman should be coming along in the next few minutes and may ask you if you know where Abby is. All you have to do is say 'I don't know'. Do you think you can do that? Good, thank-you. I'll be in the Suture Room if I'm wanted for a trauma." Saying this she walked off down the hallway, missing by seconds her mother-in-law who came sweeping over to the admit desk as if on the warpath.  
  
Eleanor Carter stood at the desk and scanned the area. Eventually her eyes settled on Erin nervously fidgeting in the background and she called over to her imperiously. "You!"  
  
"Who, me?" Erin asked, looking over her shoulder to see if there was anybody else this woman could have been speaking to.  
  
"Yes, you, come here," she beckoned. Erin dropped the lab results she had been looking at and walked over to Mrs Carter.   
  
"Can I help you, Ma'am?"  
  
"Yes you most certainly can. I want to speak to Abigail Carter, could you show me where she is?"  
  
"I'm afraid I can't do that. Members of the public aren't really allowed here without a valid medical reason."  
  
Eleanor gave a tight smile and straightened her shoulders: this one would obviously require her to use a certain degree of charm.  
  
"You don't seem to understand. I have a luncheon appointment with Mrs Carter which she has obviously forgotten to mention. She really wouldn't thank you for not telling her that I'm here, so if you can't tell me where she is then I hope you don't mind me asking if you could go and get her for me."  
  
"I can't do that either, Ma'am. I'm not supposed to interrupt unless there's a medical emergency of some kind, and but if you don't mind sitting over there in chairs you can wait for her next break."  
  
Eleanor's small amount of patience snapped at this. She raised herself to her full height and looked down her nose at the poor, unsuspecting medical student. "Now listen here Miss…?"  
  
"Harkins. Erin Harkins."  
  
"Miss Harkins. My son is Dr John Carter. I'm sure you'll co-operate with me if for no other reason than to suck up to him. You look like you're good at it," she sneered. "Now tell me where my daughter-in-law is so that we can both get on with our lives."  
  
"She's in with a patient at the moment," Erin said meekly. "In the suture room."  
  
"And that is…?"  
  
"Down the hall, last door on the right."  
  
"Thank you Miss Harkins. Good day." Saying this she turned and started to walk away in the direction pointed out by Erin Hawkins. She came to the appointed door and found it ajar, so she pushed it open and found Susan applying a dressing to a patient's arm.  
  
"We're a little busy in here…oh, Mrs Carter. Can I help you?" Susan asked, annoyed at the interruption at first but changing her attitude on seeing who had entered.  
  
"I was looking for my daughter-in-law. I was told she was in here."  
  
"Nope, haven't seen her I'm afraid," Susan shook her head emphatically and went back to examining her patient. "Have you tried looking for Carter? Normally if you can't find one of them it's always best to ask for the other."  
  
"Thank you. I'm sorry to have kept you," she said, turning on her heel and walking out of the room.  
  
"It's no problem. Nice to see you again…Okay, it's safe to come out now!" Susan called out after she was sure Eleanor had left earshot. Abby gingerly stepped out from behind the screen and looked about her cautiously.  
  
"Is she gone?"  
  
"She's gone. Boy do you owe me for this!"  
  
"I'll make it up to you, I promise. Guess I'd better go and get those extra bandages you wanted. It's a good thing you asked for them otherwise I wouldn't have had time to hide!"  
  
"You're welcome, and I'm sure Mr Russell here understands why he had to wait…or at least he would if he wasn't passed out in a drunken stupor," Susan added wryly, glancing at the figure lying on the table.  
  
Abby laughed and opened the door to go to the supply closet only to find her way blocked. Her husband, John Carter, was leaning against the wall with a slightly amused expression on his face as he took in Abby's shock, and when she considered who was standing next to him she supposed she wasn't really surprised.   
  
There in the hallway, staring directly at her, was Eleanor Carter…and she looked less than happy to see her.   
  
"Abigail my dear" she said coldly. "You haven't been avoiding me, have you?"  
  
-------------------  
  
(Want to know what happens next? How Carter got to be there? All you have to do is review and tune in tomorrow! Em) 


	9. Unbetad chapter in which not much actual...

(I had this all ready and typed up ready to go a couple of hours ago. Unfortunately my computer decided to shut itself down and it turns out I had forgotten to save the changes. Oh well, I've finished typing it back in now, not as good as the original draft but still worth reading I hope. Sorry that once more my crap computer prevented me from keeping my promise. Never buy Toshiba! Quick thanks to Lily for pointing out that it should be Erin Harkins and not Hawkins in the last chapter. I have changed this so hopefully my indifference to the character has been masked. Honestly, does anyone else find her a cynical recreation of the Lucy character without any of the endearing qualities? Oh well, just me then! Enjoy. Em.)  
  
Part 9  
  
Abby looked quickly over at Carter and, realising he wasn't going to help her out of the mess she had gotten herself into, she nervously tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and cleared her throat.  
  
"Mrs Carter! How lovely to see you. I didn't know you were planning on coming to the hospital today."  
  
Eleanor's eyes narrowed. "How strange," she said frostily. "I was under the distinct impression that we were meeting for lunch this afternoon to discuss seating arrangements."  
  
Abby shivered involuntarily at Eleanor's tone but plastered a bright smile on her face and answered in as cheerful a voice as she could muster. "I wish I'd known. You should have come to get me and we could have gone somewhere nice."  
  
If it was possible Eleanor Carter's eyes narrowed even further and her voice was pure venom as she responded. "I did come looking for you. I was assured you were in that room you've just left, in fact, but when I came in there you were nowhere to be seen."  
  
"Funny that!" Abby whispered under her breath.  
  
"What was that?"  
  
"I said I was probably next door in the trauma room picking up supplies. I'm sorry to have missed you."  
  
"I'm sure you were."  
  
Whilst this conversation had been taking place Carter had remained in the background observing the two women, oddly fascinated and wondering who would be the first to break the veneer of false civility. He soon became aware, however, of the looks that Abby was sending his way, and something told him that unless he stepped in soon he wasn't going to be very popular at home for a while. Pushing himself away from the wall he came to stand beside Abby and put his arm around her shoulder, forcing his mother to turn her attention to him.  
  
"Well, now that we're all here together how about we all go out and get something to eat. I was coming to get Abby anyway when I bumped into you, Mom, and we haven't really had a chance to all sit down together and talk since you got back into town. What do you say?" he asked, looking down at Abby to see what she thought of the idea.  
  
"I've just had my break," she said, feeling Eleanor's eyes on her but looking at Carter. "Besides, we're going out to dinner tonight so we can all talk then."  
  
"That's tomorrow night, dear," Eleanor said in her best condescending voice and with a false smile on her face. "I suppose you find the days just bleed together, though. Being a nurse every day must seem the same after a while.  
  
Carter felt Abby tense in his arms, and a quick look at her face showed that she was seething. Sensing that she was about to say something that would do nothing to improve relations between her and his mother he stepped between them and spoke quickly.  
  
"Alright, Mom, so Abby can't make it to lunch. How about you and I go instead? It would be nice to catch up and spend a bit of time together."  
  
"That would be lovely John," Eleanor smiled. "Shall we be getting along then? I know you don't have very long and I don't want to keep you."  
  
"I'll be along in just a minute, there's something I want to say to Abby first. You can wait for me in the lounge if you want."  
  
"Alright darling. Abigail, I look forward to seeing you tomorrow. Hopefully you'll be feeling a little bit more sociable by then."  
  
Saying this she turned and walked down the hall towards the main desk. Abby immediately set off to confront her but before she could Carter caught hold of her arm and pulled her into an empty exam room across the hall. As soon as the door had closed behind them Abby vented the emotion she had been holding in check.  
  
"I hate that woman!"  
  
"Abby."  
  
"And she hates me too so don't do trying to make any excuses for her!"  
  
"She is my mother."  
  
"Only when it suits her." Abby continued, not wanting to be interrupted mid- rant. "She's only being nice now because she wants to throw this party and be the centre of attention again."  
  
"That's not the reason," Carter said soothingly, walking over to her and placing his hands on her shoulders.  
  
"She's got it all planned. She wants to invite half of Chicago so that you can see what a bad deal you got with me and run off with a society beauty that she approves of!"  
  
"Don't be silly. She just wants to help out, that's all. You and I are having a little trouble with the whole baby thing and she feels a little powerless. She wants to help out in any way she can. Would it really hurt to let her take charge of this anniversary party? I mean."  
  
Carter stopped in surprise when he realised that Abby had backed away from him and was looking at him intently.  
  
"You told her?"  
  
Something about her tone of voice told him that he had done something wrong, but hopefully pleading ignorance would get him out of this. "Excuse me?"  
  
"You said she feels powerless about the 'baby thing'," Abby said slowly, running the conversation over in her mind. "Does that mean you told her about us?"  
  
Uh-oh.  
  
"I might have mentioned something in passing." he started in a small voice  
  
"I can't believe you sometimes, John!" Abby exploded. "You know your mother is always on the lookout for the slightest little thing to make my life a misery and you go and hand it to her on a silver platter! What on earth possessed you?"  
  
"It wasn't like that," he said, trying to explain himself. "She was talking about the anniversary and asking why we weren't starting to think about starting a family, so I said that we were, and that."  
  
".and that we were having problems conceiving," she finished his sentence for him. "Jesus, John! There are some things you just don't tell your mother and this is one of them. She's got to be loving this."  
  
"No she's not! She swore she wouldn't make an issue about this so long as she got free rein with the planning, and I didn't think that was too unreasonable. After all, she is just trying to be helpful."  
  
"I can't believe you sold your soul to the Devil," Abby muttered to herself.  
  
"C'mon, Abby, it's only a party and she is my mother," Carter pleaded, trying one last time to placate Abby; he had never seen her this angry and it frightened him that it was his mother who had this effect on her. Abby, however, evidently didn't want to hear his excuses and rounded on him with force.  
  
"Listen to me, John," she said firmly, pointing a finger at her husband. "She can do what she likes with this party, I honestly don't care. I'll go along, play the dutiful daughter-in-law, whatever it takes. But until then if that woman comes near me the question of whether or not you are able to have children will be a moot point! Do you understand me?"  
  
Carter shivered and reflexively lowered his hands. He nodded his head and gulped once before answering in a small voice. "I'll tell her to back off."  
  
"You do that," Abby hissed, turning on her heel to leave the room. At the door she paused with her hand on the handle, debating whether to turn back or not. She had been standing in this position for a minute or so when Carter called out to her softly.  
  
"Abby?"  
  
When she didn't respond he walked over to her slowly, tentatively placing a hand on her shoulder and saying her name again.  
  
"Abby? Abby what's wrong?"  
  
More silence. Carter was starting to get worried and was about to call her again when he heard her say something:  
  
"I got my period this morning."  
  
She didn't turn around but looked down at her feet and spoke in such a small voice that Carter wasn't sure if he had heard her or not. He hadn't even realised she was late. Instead of questioning her he simply turned her around and pulled her gently into his arms, allowing her to snuggle against his chest and continue when she felt comfortable.  
  
"I was only three days late but you know me, I'm never late. It's a stupid thing to get upset about and I shouldn't have let it get to me, but you can see why the last thing I need to deal with at the moment is your mother and her snide comments.oh God, I'm so sorry!" she added, bursting into tears and clutching onto his shirt. Carter wrapped his arms even tighter around her body and let her cry it out.  
  
"What are you sorry for?" he said soothingly, rubbing her back as the sobs subsided. "You can't help that this was a false alarm. We're both a little anxious so it's only natural that we're going to jump the gun a couple of times."  
  
"That's not what I'm sorry for," Abby sniffed, pulling away from him slightly and rubbing away the last of her tears with her sleeve. "I swore that I would never blame you for your mother because you've never blamed me for mine, but here I am shouting at you because I can't go down the hall right now and wring her neck.no matter how much I want to!"  
  
Carter laughed and kissed Abby gently on the lips. "Plenty of time for that at Christmas. The whole family feels the same round about then."  
  
"Really? Think Gamma will hold her down for me?"  
  
"She'd do pretty much anything if you asked her to.you want me to go and tell Mom that I can't make it to lunch anymore?" he asked, cocking his head to one side and regarding Abby closely as he wiped away the traces of tears on her cheek. She was joking again, but he wanted to be sure that she wasn't just putting on a front as she usually did.  
  
"No, I'll be fine if I keep myself busy, speaking of which I'm supposed to be fetching more gauze for Susan so I'd better get going."  
  
"Are you sure?" Her eyes were still a little teary and red from crying, and he knew she was a little more emotional than usual at the moment.  
  
"Go!" she ordered, smiling as she held open the door and ushered him out of it. "I've already kept her little boy away from her for too long, and we want tomorrow to go nice and smoothly don't we? Don't give her any more reasons to be upset at me."  
  
Carter bent down and gave her another kiss in the doorway, smiling in response to her smile. "I'll have a word with mother. She's not all that bad and she can be very sweet sometimes. You two just got off on the wrong foot."  
  
"If you say so," Abby said absently, not really believing but Carter was saying but humouring him nevertheless. "Now go and have lunch with your mother, and I'll see you when you get back."  
  
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(Not really an ending to that chapter because I couldn't really think of one! Hope it didn't disappoint, and I'm sorry that I didn't keep to my 'next day' promise. I swear I'm good at deadlines when it comes to essays! No promises when the next part will come, but if it isn't posted by Sunday then it won't be until after the 13th. Two big essay deadlines coming up unfortunately so I can't put them off much longer!) 


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